My resolution bit the dust five days in. FIVE DAYS. That cannot be a good omen for the rest of the year surely? However I am far too good a mood to let it thwart me. Today is good. I spent the entire night writing- all night long the only sounds were me typing, swearing when I needed to spell check or look something up, pacing a little and sighing contently when it was all out of my head and printed before me. 12,000 words later (give or take syntax.... and grammmmmmar) I am lighter than I have been in weeks. I will never show anyone what it was that made me feel heavier. It's for me, but the fact that I had the follow through to start what I began at 11pm last night gives me hope for this year. Writing in a blog daily will not give me the satisfaction that is desired if I am not writing what I want to be read.
Today I spend it reading and doing exactly what I want to do. Selfish? Almost certainly. Necessary? More so than breathing!
I have spent far too long being concerned with others; friends, family, random peers. They don't care for my opinion, and that isn't being deprecating in anyway, that's just fact. I will try to worry less. Reduce the stress somewhat. Talk to who I want to, be with who i want to see and then see where I feel I am standing after this is somewhat continuous.
No more annual resolutions- who is to say I don't try something for a month and then pick up something new after that? Far more productive and useful for the restless person in me.
The irony of this good feeling.... my internet just died... COUGH. Fear not I copy, I paste, I save...
Sigh.
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